The Comparison Delusion



It started with her eyes.

Something beautiful,

delicious looking



Like Eve

my eyes, easily distracted,

attracted to other lovelies,

imagined relationships,

longings to be like her or her,

secretly glad I’m not like her.

My Creator,

my Abba Father,

You make no mistakes,

Your plans are perfect, always for my good.

Weaknesses, flaws, inadequacies within

that I disdain

are given by You that I might trust you.

Your sufficient grace cannot be known

Apart from experiencing need;

Perplexities, diseases, failures, imperfections

force me to fall before

Your throne.

And it is very good.


With what you have given

is not natural.

Forgive my constantly wandering eyes

Comparing, measuring, evaluating

myself against others

instead of fixing my eyes on Jesus,

Author and Perfector of my faith.

Your kind providence has set the frame

of my life

and You wisely administer all that enters my space.

Impress me deeply with a sense

of Your goodness to me in all things,

for You are always



Are you like me, weary of the comparison trap we women fall into daily, hourly? Fixing my eyes on Jesus every day is not natural. But it is a choice I must make. I used to wish at times for a monastic life; removed from the rush, pressures, constant temptations of life in this age. Solitude, quiet and an infinitely slower pace sounded attractive.

But the serpent would have found me there too, whispering his lies about my lack of beauty, my lack of quick thinking, my lack of devotion, my lack of knowledge … and on and on. Even there my eyes would need deliberate focusing on Jesus.

Nothing is too hard for Him. Nothing is impossible with God.  So my struggle in this world of screens, prosperity, deadlines, and pressures is nothing to Him. He can give me all I need in every moment if I will but ask. Then believe by faith.

And that is where I miss the mark. I too often move ahead without praying or I pray and then move ahead in my own power and strength. Learning the faith-walk life takes a lifetime. Breathing prayers all day is one step toward always leaning on Jesus.

Breath prayers they are called. In all those moments of deep inhaling and exhaling during our days (pay attention to how often you are doing this … they are signals of the pressure or anxiety you are carrying) ask God to help you voice simple prayers, Scripture prayers are best.

From today’s prayer repeat often this week as you breathe, “You are enough, give me contentment, fix my eyes on Jesus, forgive me for comparing.” These are words of music to the ears of Your Father.

This is learning to walk with God.

This is how we begin to experience Him every day.

Practice talking to Him with these words and your own.

He is near.

Eager to help you see Him.

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16 thoughts on “The Comparison Delusion”

  1. lenora clinton

    So very true. God gives us what we need and what is best for us. And we must be content and thank him cause He is our Creator and our God and whom we should trust in and he is faithful in all his doings. PTL and ask forgiveness for not being content with all he has given me. LGC

  2. Such an encouragement. I am reminded of the hymn: Turn your eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face; and the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.

  3. These words of truth touched my heart and made me feel repentant from my tendency to “look over there and then look back at myself” either criticising or shrinking in “less than world” where sadly I have resided most of my life. Woe is me but I know that all things are possible with our Great God and sometimes minute by minute I lean into him and He is my rock.

  4. Thank you for this beautififul poem-like journal. I’m everyday resisting Satan but you know we all Christian each of us is given power from Jesus which is greater than Satan. We should know that he only merely accuse of Christians for anything he thinks applicable only because he is jealous of Christians (and people who still got chances).
    That fact alone demonstrates the sovereignty of the God.
    I rest assured God never takes away the truth from His people no matter what as He is sovereign.
    Earthly attempts all end in vain in precious name of Jesus Christ.

    In prayer

  5. Thank you so much for pointing us to Jesus, to fix our eyes on Him the author and perfecter of our faith! I so needed this today after giving in to comparing myself mentally with other women at church yesterday… It has been a long week of challenges both with the unusual snowy weather and health challenge of my husband.

  6. As I read this, it was as if the author knew me personally; like she knew me very well! For 50+ years I have struggled with self esteem & compared myself to other females. This is beautiful Barbara. Thank you! I will print it & hang it where I see it as a reminder.

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