Lord, I need to borrow something.
We had another disagreement,
My husband and I.
His officing at home for over a year now
has produced more opportunities
to trust You than I expected,
exposed more of my flaws than I care to see.
My time is not my own,
my house no longer my daytime sanctuary,
my kitchen island his landing strip;
keys, backpack, devices, papers, mail, glasses, strewn end to end,
like when my six
usurped my world, my space, my peace.
I remind myself
I’d rather have him and his messes
than not have him at all,
this house is OURS
More than once I’ve prayed,
“thank you, Lord, that I don’t live alone,
I am so very grateful.
I know your sufficiency would be enough
for a life of widowhood;
thank You that that time has not yet come.”
But today, Lord, I am in need.
I need to borrow
(though I won’t return, can’t repay)
from Your divine nature
because You promised
“Your divine power has granted to me
everything for life and godliness!”*
Oh how I need everything You offer, Lord!
In myself I see
don’t possess patience
can’t grow godliness
struggle with self-control and high control,
even my love for those I love is cracked
inadequate, not enough.
But You invite me
to come to Your throne room
ask for what I lack,
walk up to Your banquet table and partake
of Your limitless divine nature!
O Fountain of all Good
by the door of the cross
You have opened this way for me
to be holy in all my conduct*(I P.1.15)
as You are holy.*(I P.1:16)
I need to borrow not just some of you,
but all of You.
Giver of every good and perfect gift.
before your Majesty and Perfection
overwhelmed by my ever-present need,
and I ask;
Give me from Your limitless supply of perfect patience,
Your limitless perfect love,
that I may share in your holiness.* (Heb12:10)
Kneed Your grace into my heart,
make me like Jesus,
in His image, His likeness,
for I can perform no lasting heart repair on my own.
“whoever feeds on me
will live because of Me,” (jn.6:57)
I come today,
A couple weeks ago I had a dream. As most are it had a strange setting that made no sense, but what I did understand clearly was there was a man in the crowd of people who had been with Jesus. And everyone wanted to follow Him. What he offered was valuable, rich and lasting while all the others at the market were selling cheap counterfeits.
When I woke up I remembered the verse in Acts 4:13, “They were uneducated common men, but everyone recognized ‘they had been with Jesus.’”
Do those around you see you have been with Jesus? It’s what I want more than anything: to be with Jesus, to experience His presence more and more and for it to change my life so it’s obvious that I have been with Jesus.
One way to experience His life-changing power is to partake of His divine nature, promised to us. Have you ever considered how stunningly generous it is of God to condescend, to stoop down to me and you, and share His godly qualities?
The longer I walk with God the more I see how right is His declaration, “there is none who seeks God, no one does good, not even one,” (Romans 3:11 & 12). Instead of trying harder, telling yourself “I should be able to…” on our own, which I did for too many years, I invite you to join me is taking from God’s limitless divine nature.
He offers Himself to us, but our pride keeps us from taking. And so we continue to fail to love well. It’s so unnecessary! Let’s be women who run to Him with all our inabilities and partake from His “everything for life and godliness.” Then those around us; our spouses, our families, our friends, neighbors, and even strangers will see that we have been with Jesus!
May it be so for each one of us, Lord!