Motherhood, for me, was a minefield of less-than-honorable passions. Sloughing through a thankless and often humiliating gauntlet of messes and mistakes elicited more anger and exhausted misery than I ever thought possible. Yes, there were multitudes of joys. But that was not where most of the lessons were learned.
Not until I had been mothering for almost two decades did I fully understand and accept that motherhood was God’s school of reformation for me. His training efforts in my heart were as vital to Him as the training of my children was to me! I could not find success in my role without continually, daily—even hourly—submitting myself to His government of my life and my home…and my frustrated, spent heart.
There are two parts to this mysterious motherhood lesson plan of His: to earnestly pray for stamina to regulate my passions, aka my frustrations, my anger, my impatience, and yet to simultaneously not depend on my own strength to do so. Susanna’s prayer comforts me because she let’s me know she too, saint that she was, had struggles as a mom.
Only He can give me patience when I have none, strength to reply in gentleness when my flesh wants to yell, and self-control in other difficult situations. But I must ask Him and be willing to ask hourly or even every other minute.
Mothering is such a thankless job, but the God who gave me my children sees all and it is Him I must please. As we start another school year it’s a good time to reflect on what’s ahead and ask these questions.
- Am I depending on what I possess?
- In recognition of my utter bankruptcy will I lean on Him alone?
- Am I willing to recognize that motherhood is God’s school of training in godliness for me?
From one who failed more than I ever imagined I would, I want to encourage you to ask God for all that you need over and over and over. Learn to pray minute by minute if needed during your day. And give thanks for the unending messes and lessons that have to be repeated because God gave you these children for your good, for their good and for His glory. He makes NO mistakes! And that’s worth celebrating!