Unbelievable that we are here!

my man and I are in a place
irritating and all too familiar.
I just discovered
our schedules are not in sync.

“We talked about this,” he said,
“yes, but I couldn’t look at my calendar
in that moment and then forgot.”

And now we are double booked.
He confirmed the trip, flights were reserved,
assuming I was all in.
That’s what he heard in the rush of the moment
while I was distracted by other things.

My “that sounds fine”
was generic, without context
or view of the whole.
I agreed with only partial knowledge.

I’m having to adapt…again.
Changes can’t be made.

Lord you know this has been a repeated conflict of ours
at least twenty-five years or more.
Kids sports, schools, tutors, orthodontists,
church, career, committees …
our lives mini tornados,
debris flying.

Planning for days at home
for respite and margin,
must be defended
but oh how discouraged I become
when those hopes are dashed
by calendar conflicts.

Jesus you didn’t have a day planner
or desk with to-do lists,
but plenty of others had agendas for Your life;
like my kids, You too had multitudes who pulled,
begged and cried for Your attention.

And You came to us with a predetermined agenda for Your life,
a plan from before time began,
fully designed, notated, scheduled;
without reminders on your watch,
no to-do list on your phone.
You were always at the right place at the right time.

You never overbooked either,
only did “things that are pleasing to Him.”*
Your brothers, mother, disciples
even Your arch enemy couldn’t divert You
from Your supreme goal.

How unlike me.

Our calendar conflict is
not too much for you to resolve.
A reminder for me to pay attention, listen more.

Oh Lord of all
help me be like Jesus,
always listening to His Father,
never multitasking like me.

Help me slow my pace,
listen for Your voice, Your nudge, Your peace,
Your affirmation; “this is the way, walk in it.”
I want to be like You, Jesus.
“I am near good when I am near You,
to be like You is a glorious thing.”*

May it be ever so,

[1] John 8:29, ESV
[2] Isaiah 30:21, ESV
[3] Bennett, Arthur. Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers.(Banner of Truth, 1975), p.10.

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3 thoughts on “Schedules”

  1. Deborah
    I’ll be 70 on my soon birthday! How did I get here? By God’s grace!
    Adopting two girls from the foster care system in our late 50’s (when most people we knew were celebrating their empty nest freedoms) was God’s call for us. Trying to homeschool two completely different personalities and abiliies
    through their high school years is not something I had penciled in my calendar. It is TOUGH!!
    God has been trying to get me to be more disciplined my whole life. I am great at starting and making the most
    wonderful of schedules with everything neatly happening seamlessly in its time slot. It has never worked out!!
    He is trying to teach me that I am not in control, He IS.
    He is teaching me to ask Him what He wants me to get done in a day BEFORE I make out my schedule MY way and then ask Him to bless it. I am realizing that my children can become great at what ever they choose but if they are not serving the Lord then they are still going to Hell as a great doctor, professor, writer, scientist, athlete etc. That if they do not refect the character of Christ in their own lives then no true sucess has been achieved.
    Sports do not trump church. If we do not take our children to church but bring them to the Sunday morning practices or games for the sake of a better college reume’ then we are showing our children where God stands
    in our hearts and is reflected in our schedules. Where are the Eric Lidells of this age?? Let us not be too busy to read to our children about the great saints that went before and the sacrifices they made to “give what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose”.
    May we all look at our schedules in the light of eternity and eliminate those things that are not of eternal value to gain the time to prioritze what God would have us do with the life He gave us.

  2. Forwarding this to hubby with apologies and affirmation that I am working on it – 25 years of marriage to a traveling man and I’m still not there! Thank you for encouraging us :)

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