Small Lies Add Up

A few years ago I saw a tweet from my son and I always read what my sons post on Twitter.

Ben linked this article, The Surprisingly Large Cost of Telling Small Lies, and said in his tweet, “something I need to work on immediately.” Impressed with his transparency I opened the article and began to read. Liking the content I retweeted, closed the page and went on with my busy day.

But as I worked my to do list my mind kept returning to the article’s theme that small lies add up, they influence what we think and who we become. Stretching the facts a bit for greater impact, rounding numbers up or eliminating details that aren’t favorable to one’s image are common practices for most of us.

As moms, we are usually united in determination to raise kids who are truth tellers. In our house lying was a very big deal. We knew the Proverb which says, “Six things the Lord hates, no seven.” And in that list is “a lying tongue.” If God hates lying so too must we. When children are capable of deliberately crafting a lie, usually after their third birthday, we dealt with our little ones’ budding deceit quickly, leaving no doubt in their little minds that it was a big “no-no.” And with each of them the lying ceased for a season. It resurfaced as they got older and thought they could outwit their parents, but God helps parents who pray and ours usually got caught.

However the linked article is about adult lying, so a few questions for us grown-ups. Have you ever exaggerated a story about a friend to your husband to make yourself look more righteous, better than her? Guilty. Have you added adjectives to your description of someone or something to enhance your point to get what you want? Affirmative. What about telling a friend how long you’ve worked or served in the church or a good cause and you stretched the facts just a little to pad the impact? Hmmm.  I’ve certainly heard this one.

This isn’t about pointing fingers at others. It’s choosing to listen to the Holy Spirit of God speak to our own hearts, open our own eyes to what He sees. It is His responsibility to show us our errors, our mistakes, our sin. It is ours to listen, confess and ask for His guidance that we might speak only what is true and good and right. An impossibility without the Spirit of God. Agree?

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4 thoughts on “Small Lies Add Up”

  1. Oh I am so sorry that happened to you, Bonnie. Unfortunately, your story is all too familiar with my family, as sexual abuse came down through the generations. The reason it continued, because everyone was silent. I applaud you for your bravery in sharing this deep pain. I will be praying that you get the right counseling, as it is Jesus desire to mend the broken hearted. I claim Isaiah 61:1-4 over your life. “The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, Because the Lord has anointed Me To preach the gospel tidings to the poor, He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives(anyone oppressed by Satan), And the opening of the prison to those who are bound( our invisible chains to sin/ condemnation from Satan); To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, And the day of vengeance ( against Satan and his hordes from hell) of our God, To comfort all who mourn, To console those who mourn in Zion, To give beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning ( God will restore what Satan took), The garment of praise for the Spirit of heaviness ( we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but the powers and principalities of this world); That they may be called trees of righteousness ( those who are in Christ)The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified. The planting of the Lord, that He my be glorified ( God doesn’t waste our pain) And they shall rebuild the old ruins, They shall raise up the former desolations, And they shall repair the ruined citites( past generational sin) The desolations of many generations.

    Words in parentheses are mine. NKJV bible. Jesus came to destroy the works of Satan, and we are to appropriate what He did for us. Besides having a strong foundation/ standing of His Truth and His word.. A great read on this- Restoring the Broken Walls of Past Generations. Elenor Butkiewicz


  2. I am ashamed to admit…I lived a lie all my life until 2009.
    Starting in elementary school on through college I was abused. I never spoke of it. Instead lived”in a shell” I didn’t talk much even to my family.
    My family, friends, others assumed “Bonnie” is so shy!”
    No, I wasn’t/ not shy. I was afraid that if I talked, I would tell someone something I didn’t want anyone to know.

    1. Bonnie,

      I’m so sorry you went through that. You are very brave to share this truth now. I just want to tell you I’m praying for you this morning and asking for healing of your mind, body and soul.

      As you are honest with others about this, may the Lord give you freedom in your heart and the grace to help others.

      Love in Him,


    2. Barbara Rainey

      I love the quick and kind responses to you Bonnie. I hope you were encouraged reading them as I was. I too felt sad for you as I read your story and then hopeful as you bravely rejected the lie. We are grateful to have you in our community. May you continue to grow in the knowledge and grace of our Lord Jesus!

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